Boy, this John Cena heel turn sucks

As always, 'Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect' is about who is signing his checks

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Not the response we were hoping for, John
Not the response we were hoping for, John
Photo: Jonathan Bachman/AP Images for WWE (AP)

It’s what a good portion of wrestling fans have wanted for a couple of decades now. John Cena finally going heel. Well, like most things WWE does, when it finally happened it landed with a splat on par of tossing turkeys from a helicopter (IFYKYK).

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This isn’t the first time Cena has trudged over the ethics of equality and diversity he loves to trumpet to protect those who sign the checks. Remember how quickly he backed up at lightning speed to apologize to China after calling Taiwan a country? Gotta keep those audiences pouring into the theater for Suicide Squad and Cockblockers (which admittedly was funnier than it had any right to be).

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On one hand, it is unfair to expect someone to bus toss their friend, even their close friend, simply because the rest of us are — even if it’s impossible to imagine Vince McMahon having close friends. After all, McMahon made Cena the multi- multi-millionaire that he is. They’ve been close, in whatever fashion, for 20 years or more. Who wants to believe this stuff about someone that’s been such a part of their lives for so long?

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On the other though, there isn’t really a debate on what happened, or the ugliness of it. Cena should know that much, and could have just refrained from commenting. Or, as he probably wants to do every other time, thread the needle of expressing understanding of every angle while not really taking one. That’s usually the politician’s play. Something like, “As a friend of Vince’s for so long I was extremely disappointed to find out about his alleged crimes and inappropriate behavior, and as his friend, I hold him to a higher standard than that. Which I will continue to do.” Maybe that’s hard to think of off the cuff, but Cena is worldly enough to know that these questions are coming, and it’s not like everything else about him isn’t prepped and washed (and shaved!).

Also, John, what McMahon is accused of aren’t “imperfections.” They’re heinous. This isn’t a guy who has a habit of stealing a soda from the grocery store or likes to belch loudly in public. These are allegations and stories of McMahon using his position of power to take advantage of women who worked for him, whether consensually or not. (“Mr. McMahon denies and always has denied raping [Rita] Chatterton,” his lawyer Jerry McDevitt told the Wall Street Journal. A WWE spokesperson also told WSJ that the relationship between McMahon and a female paralegal formerly employed by the company was consensual. Additionally, per WSJ, McDevitt said that the paralegal hadn’t made any claims of harassment against McMahon and that “WWE did not pay any monies” to the ex-employee “on her departure.”)

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He’s also, possibly, quite happy to turn over his company to Saudi Arabia simply for the money without considering all that comes into that, including the position it’ll put some of his former employees. But who cares, as long as Vince gets his check?

And some of that check still goes to Cena, which he is all too aware of.